Damn, that title should get your reading this Sunday’s Turkey Hollow Almanac. One can’t help but think of sexuality as the animals around the woods are taking spring to heart. They are breeding all over the place. It appears that the does have headed deep into the forest to find safe places to give birth to the little fawns. Soon my yard will be filled with baby deer and overly protective mothers. Sounds like a visit to some of my friends’ houses.  

It seems like every time I look out the window some animal is getting it on. The new spring must be an aphrodisiac, full of fragrant spring blossoms, warm afternoon sunshine, soft green grass and the music of a warm wind blowing through new leaves. I wish I could offer them privacy but I must admit I am too curious to watch the various ways that animals express love and create life. I thought I was wise to the ways of the world, but these animals have positions, noises and techniques that make all of us look like missionaries.

Now, I wonder where they learned them. Is there a course provided by the adult animals for the young ones to learn the mating calls and the ABC’s of mating? Or do the young ones instinctively know what is expected and what is available as they get older?

Sexuality is such a powerful force in all of our lives and as much pleasure as it gives us, it can also cause great pain. For most of us, sexuality was either spoken about in whispers or not at all. When I was growing up, there was no lecture from my parents, no sex education class in school and certainly no books in any library that would enable us to seek answers to why these strange urges were surfacing. We were left to fend for ourselves.

What little information we did get from institutions like churches, schools, the media and our families was laced heavily with fear and shame. No one urged us to reach inside ourselves to realize our fantasies and to discover the joy of fulfilling them. Never were we urged to use sexuality as a form of bonding, expression or self discovery. People who deviated from the traditional missionary positions and engaged in role play, experimented or simply make it a place of great joy were often held up to ridicule. Many of those who openly celebrated their sexuality were described as sick and often shunned by others.

Just think, if we as a society could lift some of that shame and replace it with joy and discovery. How many marriages have ended in divorce over sexual issues? How many people have gone through life in anger and feeling shame for having what, in reality, are harmless fantasies? How many expressions of love and joy have been left behind because of the fear of being viewed as sick or not normal?

Since my youth, we have come a long way. I think more and more parents are being responsible and having healthy conversations with their children about sexuality. People are starting to insist on the right to explore and stretch the bounds of what is viewed as “normal.” There are publications for almost any fantasy or fetish which does not leave one feeling alone or shame. Some schools have sex education classes. 

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if sex became a healing place that is filled with love, trust and adventure? That one could share experiences openly and with pride. 

It seems to me, that we need education not only on the physical aspects of sexuality but also the spirituality. We need to learn how to honestly conduct positive dialogue with our partners and to learn to respect not only their desires but their emotions and feelings. We should work so that sexuality becomes a place of beauty and joy. We should work to become at one with nature with our sexuality and make it a spiritual journey of self discovery.

One evening I was at a dinner party and a person at the table with great judgment in their voice said, “I hear they are disgusting and they act like animals in the bedroom.” From what I can see outside my window, that might not be a bad thing.